Why Most People Fail to be Authentic

This has been bothering me for quite some time now. As I notice, many people try to act good, look good and impress other people. Yet they fail at being authentic. Let me explain.

One time, I was walking in Makati, going to Entrepreneur class. I bumped into a college friend and caught up about what's going on with each others' lives. But then I said, I have this idea of putting up a school. He seems to be interested in it because he said he wanted to teach. Even told me that it has been a dream of him to teach. We both grew in the same province. And we both want to change the way some subjects in school was taught. I told him, I would contact him if I pushed through with the idea.

I contacted him the next day and guess what? No reply.

Another time, I admire the professor at a school I went into. Having to commute for 2 hours just to get to school, I always go to school early to avoid traffic. I was 2 hours early this time and I found myself waiting with the teacher I admire. Only the 2 of us standing, waiting for the janitor to arrive for the key to the school.

It was my chance to pick the brain of this teacher. I wanted to have a conversation. Because in class, he was very chatty and friendly and always giving advice. But I was disappointed to realize that when outside, he was a different person. Every question I asked was answered with short answers. You know, when you want people to stop bugging you and you answer them back with short "yes", "no" and "maybe" answers? Something like that.

I have experienced a lot more of this kind situations in the past. Makes me think if the problem was with me and not other people.

I have a theory that people will put on a mask. And every time the situation is non threatening, or has no social pressure, they will put the mask down and reveal their true self. The mask was so that everyone would look at them in good light, more intelligent, etc. Like when you have to be good at the office, even if someone is pushing you around. That's the kind of mask what I'm talking about. A mask you put on when you arrive at the alumni homecoming. Projecting yourself that you're more successful than everybody else. Which is kind of sad when you think about it. Life is too short to live like that. And even if you think that you are doing no harm. People who believe in your mask thought that you can be a good friend or a lover or a teacher. You'll only break their heart when they found out.

Why is it so hard for everyone to just be themselves?

This is no different in the business setting. Investing in stocks is also one of the reason why you should be careful at this. CEO's and leaders of companies do put on a mask. Either to hide an anomaly or to gain investor confidence. You should always be wary of such people.

Dream Still Comes True - My School is Up

I know, I need to update this blog more often. Just an update, when I started this blog, I wrote on the Dream page the dreams that I want to fullfill. And now, one of those dreams has come true because of being financially free.

Actually, the dream became a reality last August 2014. But I forgot to update this blog. I have created a small school in our community, teaching young people Programming, since it is my background and have a passion for the craft. I can see that the products of universities in our community are not up to par to what I consider to be good at IT, CS or Engineering. Being lucky to be educated and have experience in the field, I thought to myself to give back.

The situation now has changed for the Goals page. I tried going to martial arts last year, to at least, start on my "Get a Black Belt in a Martial Art" goal. But the thing is, commuting for 2 hours is stressing me out. I like the part where I get to do martial arts, the sparring and all. But the commute to EDSA and MRT is just unhealthy and stressful for me. The whole ordeal, having to do it every single day, its making me feel depressed in some way. So I stopped. I hope to continue on that journey as soon as a martial arts gym becomes available nearby.

And for any decent martial art, its a miracle to get a black belt for a year. It takes years to master.

I will have to change goal and replace it with another one. And I have to punish myself with 2 goals for not having to push through with the original goal.

• Learn carpentry / wood working
• Learn welding / metal working

I hope to learn these skills this year. So I could build my own house/school and furnitures for it. It should be a fun project.

So for all of us, let's make 2015 a good year. :)

Why New Years Resolutions Don't Work

Man is a creature of habit. If you go about deciding to quit smoking this January while having smoked for 10 years straight. It won't work. Same as dieting, exercise or saving money. The reason is, we are a creature of habit and you can't go cold turkey once you decided you want to change.

Learning of this fact is one thing. Accepting it is another. The more you try to force yourself to change, the harder it is for you to really change something. And the weaker your self trust and will power will become. The key to this weakness of human nature, is to do the changes gradually.

Let's take for example our willingness to invest in the stock market. And eventually, retiring from the nest egg you accumulated, living off the dividends. This is a noble goal. Besides, who wants to work for the rest of their lives? But look closer, and you can see the problem. The reason you want to be free using the stock market is probably, your lifestyle as of now, is quite different from the vision of the future that you want. It might be because you have no money at the end of each month and just living from paycheck to paycheck and that's why you desire to retire using the stock market.

The fact is, you arrive at that situation in your life because of habit. A collection of small habits that made you lose money at the end of the month, just about right that you don't go into debt (or small debt) and not too much you have so much money. Surprisingly, whenever you have a bonus or increase in pay, you amazingly return to a break even point where you don't lose money nor you don't save money. Amazing isn't it?

Why does this happen?

Its because of habit.

Habits are too small to notice until they are too big to change. The collection of small habits that are reinforced over time becomes a lifestyle.

Once you embedded this habit into your life, changing them is hard. That is why, new years resolutions don't work. You are trying to break a habit that was reinforced in years.

If you've been spender for all these years and trying out the challenge of saving money in a piggy bank, you might succeed for a while. But habit is a habit and will take the best of you in other forms. How many people have you seen did this? They saved money for a year but then that money saved was used to buy gadgets or luxury bag?

The spending habit is still there, you just... delayed it. The real problem wasn't the saving... The habit was the spending. So saving might be easy for most people, and they will succeed in accumulating money. But what you do when the saving is done, is the hard part. Its another habit altogether. Some kind of like a web of habits reinforcing each bad habit after another. You might have conquered the "saving habit" now, but what about the "spending habit", "the eating habit", "the travel habit", "the fashion habit", "the giving to family members" habit? All those costs money. Even if you killed one habit, you still need to kill the others to make a significant change in your life. All of this requires conscious effort. All of this requires more than just a new years resolution. If you did not kill all the bad habits that links the chain of lifestyle that you currently live your life, you are not making any changes at all.

So what are we going to do? Are we helpless? Are we not able to change?

Of course we are able to change. But it requires a more conscious effort. What do I mean by that? Let me explain. As you know, I am a big fan of Benjamin Franklin. In his biography he once set out on a quest to become the perfect man. He wrote on a piece of paper the 13 virtues that he wanted to acquire:

1. Temperance. Eat not to dullness; drink not to elevation.
2. Silence. Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself; avoid trifling conversation.
3. Order. Let all your things have their places; let each part of your business have its time.
4. Resolution. Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve.
5. Frugality. Make no expense but to do good to others or yourself; i.e., waste nothing.
6. Industry. Lose no time; be always employ'd in something useful; cut off all unnecessary actions.
7. Sincerity. Use no hurtful deceit; think innocently and justly, and, if you speak, speak accordingly.
8. Justice. Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty.
9. Moderation. Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.
10. Cleanliness. Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, cloaths, or habitation.
11. Tranquillity. Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable.
12. Chastity. Rarely use venery but for health or offspring, never to dullness, weakness, or the injury of your own or another's peace or reputation.
13. Humility. Imitate Jesus and Socrates.

What he did was to assign each virtue to a day and practice it. For example, today is Monday and he assigned Industry to this day. He would then set out and practice Industry in everything that he do that day. And at night he would check it out on the paper indicating that the virtue has been practiced. He would then do this for the first 7 virtues, assigning each day to each virtue. Once he realized that he made a habit out of them, which means, he was practicing the virtues without consciously thinking about it, he would then replace it with a new virtue on the list. Franklin's "resolution" wasn't a one year thing, he told in his autobiography that it was a lifetime pursuit.

He was successful at making a habit at some of the virtues. But at the end of his life, he was honest to say that he found humility the hardest. Because, being a man of his stature, being well known in many parts of the world at that time, Humility for Franklin as he say is hard. He was a humble man as many people in history have indicated, perhaps Franklin has a high standard of what humility is and had trouble comparing himself to Jesus and Socrates.

So, if you want a habit to stick for you for life, make the real effort to change them for life. Firmly decide that what you're doing is a lifetime pursuit and not a fad. If the habit is worth acquiring, wouldn't it be better to pursue it for life?

Some Reflection About Business

As you know, I have enrolled myself in a business school to learn Entrepreneurship. Without the commitment of an MBA degree. Just to get an idea of what I would encounter, should I pursue an MBA. It is a 6 month long course and I think I learned a lot.

But as I get closer and closer to the end of the course (it will end on December). I realized that, I am not as enthusiastic as I was when I don't know much about business. Like in everything you don't know, it would look like "magic" at first. But when you know enough about the subject, it ceases to be magic.

And that is where I am at this point. I have listened to people who knew about business and listened to them intently with glaring eyes. It is because I thought that having a business is hard, complicated and in a word, magic. But I realized that business is not magic. Nor it is hard. It is not easy, but at the same time, it is not hard.

I began to question the reason I want to get into business now. When I think about it, before I enrolled in the course, I wanted to get into business to get power and respect. Power to have control of my own time and respect from other people because we seem to respect people who have more money.

I began to question this as I commute to school. Everyday, meditating the reason behind and what keeps me pursuing business. But it doesn't hold up to my character... My character of wanting to know about everything. And I think, going into business will only consume a lot of my time in pursuit of knowledge.

Knowing business itself is knowledge. Maybe perhaps that is the reason why it has been so alluring to me. But trading my time to get into business to get more money vs having more time to learn more about the world, technology, science, philosophy and strategy, is more appealing to me.

I'm not saying that business is not worth knowing. Everything is worth knowing. Everything.

Going into business

I thought about it a lot. I don't know much about business, so why not embark on a journey to learn about it. Maybe perhaps I could build a great business that could rival the Ayalas, the Sys.

I did some asking and did some more. I thought that MBA would be a good education if I would like to get into business. But as I ask more and more people. I came to realize that MBA wouldn't make me a businessman, its more on the skills and experience.

Some people that I respected advised me to just learn accounting, marketing and legal aspects of a business. In which I could enroll to some basic courses. Instead of going into school for 2 years taking MBA.

I am skeptical at first, so I took the plunge and enrolled myself in an entrepreneurship course. In which I find is a lot similar to an MBA curriculum without the 2 years and without the other subjects.

Just on the first day alone, I realized that business people loves buzz words. They like to make things seem... important. I know some fields have this buzz words, but when it comes to business, it seems like the focus is on the buzz words more than the actual principle behind it.

In engineering, you make up buzz words for things that you can not explain, or there are no words that currently describe a phenomena. But in business, why do they have a lot of buzz words for something that is just, profit? Bottom line, net profit, total profit, net income. These are all just money at the end of the day, why do they come up with such words? Why is bankruptcy called chapter 11? Why not just called it bankruptcy and be done with it?

Thank goodness I didn't enroll myself to a 2 year MBA. I might kill myself out of boredom. But! Accounting seems interesting, and I like the idea of putting some case studies into practice. I just don't like to buzz word heavy lectures. It seems fake learning. How could you become educated just by learning another word that describe some words?

Stock Investing Tip # 1: Treat All Financial Advisers & Stock Brokers Tip as Caveats

Financial advisers earn money when you buy an investment product. A 40% commission from the life insurance + mutual fund combo will give him a steady stream of income for as long as you continue to pay the premium. Stock brokers earn money when you buy and sell a stock. The more frequently, the better.

If you can see the problem here, that's good. You don't need this tip. But if you don't, let me tell you why...

Financial advisers and stock brokers are here to help you know where to put your money. But they earn money not on the percentages of the profit. They earn on the action you make. Your profit is irrelevant. They will earn either way. So if you win, they get money, if you don't, they still get money.

If a financial adviser or stock broker told you a tip where to invest, a VUL or a stock, always treat it as a caveat. There is no risk for him if he told you to invest here and there. But there is risk to you. Always, always remember that everything is an opinion. And everyone has their own interests. A financial adviser to meet a quota, a stock broker to make you trade frequently. None of those to make you rich.

That job falls in your hands. Its your job to profit and only you have that determination to make yourself profit in the market. I won't see stock brokers and financial advisers take a bullet for you just so you could profit. Or give you a money back for the money lost in your (or his) investment decision.

I'm not writing this to bad mouth financial advisers and stock brokers, I'm writing this for you, dear investor. Its your money, though many people seem to forget, we used to research for weeks to find the right refrigerator, but the decision ultimately comes to us when it comes down to it. Should we buy? Should we look for another one? Does this refrigerator benefits me in the long term? If we could only look at investing the same way.

Financial advisers and stock brokers have services to provide for you as an investor. They are there to help you meet your ultimate aim to profit in the market. Treat the financial adviser as you would treat a saleslady in the mall, she's there to tell you and help you about the product you want to buy and how they will benefit you. Treat the stock broker as the lady teller in your local bank, helping you with transactions such as depositing and withdrawing. Treat them with respect. But once you see them as someone who knows the key to wealth, you are in a very rude awakening... That key is you. Don't look outside. It is in your power.

How Do You Teach Someone To Invest In the Stock Market?

Teaching someone investing is different from teaching someone how to invest in the stock market. The first one is a general overview of what investing is, it could be real estate, stocks or buying jewelry. While the 2nd one is more specific and will determine the character and personality of the investor.

The hardest question for me to answer is when someone asks me, how to invest in the stock market. A life insurance agent will love this opportunity to sell an insurance product that has investment and retirement plan in it, earning himself a 40% commission in the process. But I'm not a life insurance agent and I definitely won't invest my money in insurance products.

I also don't like the 1 day seminars conducted by a lot of organizations on how to invest in the stock market. I think, that is a bit misleading. It takes me weeks to find out what's the best computer laptop to buy, it takes years of accumulated knowledge to know which specification is right for my needs, yet people seem to think that attending 1 day seminars would automatically make you an expert in a field that few of us can only master... or make profitable.

I do believe that these seminars have value. And I am not entirely against them. For example, teaching someone how to navigate an online stock trading dashboard would be a good seminar for 1 day. But teaching someone how to read charts or financial statements in one day would only do more harm than good for the investor  (but more good than harm to the broker, in terms of money). Since most people would actually study that sort of stuff in university for 5 years.

And I'm also not against insurance companies selling investment products. They are actually good, given some circumstances. But the bad news about it is that when sales quota comes first, the investor's welfare is not the #1 priority. Remember that these are salesmen, and you have to think twice before investing. They have a commission, a quota and are ambitious in pursuit of money. Your returns is probably not the first thing in their mind. Its probably their own retirement.

So how do you exactly teach someone how to invest in the stock market where financial advisers are salesmen and seminars are not enough?

Hmm... that is a big question mark and I still don't know how to answer that. When someone asks me, it always leaves me speechless. Trying to think of things to say.

How did I learn to invest? Books. But given most people are afraid to read books, I don't think I have an answer for that. What if the insurance salesman wrote a book? Reading what kinds of books is another question. But its a lot easier to answer.